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when i wear the necklace, it feels heavy. like a noose. i don't like wearin it, because it makes mi feel like a cat with a collar, belonging to someone else. not myself.
i used to like the idea of exclusive commitment, the idea that we belong to each other. but that's no longer the case. naivety have worn off to make way for the yearning to have things on my terms. i belong to myself.
woohoo!! suffering from fun-deficiency. and i can't see my tagboard. =(
exams are ending soon, n chances are dat i wun do too fab this time. mind keeps drifting off. throat closes up the at the thought of pills. ![]() Be Warned That You Are Going To Embark On A Journey That Will Very Possibly Spoil Your Appetite For The Day. the above is our dinner at Fish&Co. the Peri Peri "something" dat i tried was gd. =) though it was abit like a mix between nasi briyani n hainanese chicken rice, except dat itz fish here. i dun think her salmon was a gd bet. she regretted not sticking to her usual seafood platter. i love the mussels!! or rather, the butter that they are immersed in. ![]() i was told to get Pringles for my bro, and Manda n i picked up 2 cans of bubbly wine out of curiosity. went to the fountain near my hse to drink n chat. 13% alcohol. anyway, u can see part of the fountain. she wanted to get lyrical n classy pictures out of 2 cans of cheap wine. lolx.. her birks, and my new shoes. bought 2 pairs of shoes and 1 top yesterdae. this pair is abit big for mi, but i cldn't resist the design. =) (for those who doesn't noe the difference, my feet are on the right, hers left) alrite.. ur hell have juz begun.... ![]() i think i need to clarify that MANDA WANTED TO TAKE PICTURES. not mi. see lah.. i look like some guy who got the gal. to think we agreed on not dolling up coz the meet-up place was so near our houses. datz it lah.. nxt time i go out with her, i'm dressing to the nines. :p ![]() okie.. datz the end of your hell. =) some pics have been left out due to MY discretion. u might find the ugly pics on Manda's blog if she gets into a gd mood n decides to blog. hahhhaa.. she's all flushed after a few sips n i'm still pale despite the 1 and 1/2 cans of wine. mi n my screwed up blood circulation. anyway, walked home in a slight daze last nite after "our" drink and chat session. almost 500ml of wine all downed by mi, coz she din like the taste! lolx.. so i got abit tipsy coz i think i drank abit faster than usual. choya has 15% n it doesn't even have any effect, so i think itz the speed at which i drank it, as well as the amount. i was still able to walk in a straight line and talk coherently, so it wasn't anything much. itz about the same effect i get when i'm seriously deprived of sleep. i got home safely as u can see. din get knocked down or anything. functionable. time to save up for the next time i wanna splurge.
tipsy! lolx.. itz not the amount u drink, but the company u have.
proper blog post tmr if i'm not feelin lazy
seems like misfortune loves mi.
u noe luck is not on ur side, when u step out of the car n find ur shoe loose. u check it out, n find out dat the strap's broken. n it happens to be ur most comfy, almost favourite, pair of shoes. the ones u can wear everywhere, anytime, no matter how long. damn.. now i have to replace my silver heels. =( doubt i can find another pair of heels dat are as comfy, so much so dat i can jog in them. right.. now u noe why they broke. lolx.. rough treatment. anyway, the broken strap wasn't enuf to keep mi frm walkin frm my house to AMK Central's NTUC, to get some snacks to go with my Choya!! been drinkin Choya since last nite. parents got back frm Yunnan, n bought a bottle of Choya for mi frm the airport. 2 glasses a dae, not much rite? lolx.. even though 1 glass was downed in the afternoon. itz never too early to drink if i want to. :p Manda, if u wan, can come over n i'll share. it'll be gone soon. heeheeeee.. hic! so, i went to AMK Hub to get snacks, n walked around abit. saw a couple of tops, pants n shoes dat i dun mind having. =) scout todae, buy tomorow!!! my money is rapidly depleting.. tmr's shoppin mission shall be efficient, so dat i can go home study.. =) final terms next week. after dat i'll be free for awhile! i reallie hope there'll be some extended holidae so i can find work n earn some extra spending money. haiz... i noe my parents will probably support the idea. not sure about Someone though.. mi gettin shoes tmr!!!
alrite.. i've done a recordin for my sch assignment. for those curious souls, u can check out my profile and listen to my horrendous singin. lolx..
i think i held the mike too close coz i'll be too soft otherwise. darn.. trust mi. Live is always betta. :p
alrite.. so, friday the 13th have juz passed. n all i can sae is, seems like it reallie proved to be unlucky for mi.
first, i was in the cinema with my feet nicely tucked away to let the couple sittin beside mi pass. apparently, i din tuck my feet away enuf. usually, the space would be enuf, but apparently not todae. the woman stepped on my toe, n she was wearin heels. not juz usual heels, but those squarish heels with corners, n the one of the corners cut down on my toe n broke the skin. there was some blood, n it hurt so much that i cldn't hold back the tears. even now, hours later, it still hurts. to make matters worse, she's a rather heavy-set woman, n she did not apologise. we all noe itz possible to tell whether we've stepped on someone, but no, she did not apologise. so as much as i noe she din step on my toes on purpose, i can't help but think she's a bitch. den, as i was nursing my toe n tryin to ignore the pain, i realised i was watchin one of the worst movies i've ever seen. Sunshine is the name, and it was supposedly abt how a crew of ppl went to the sun to set it off with bombs, so that earth will no longer be as frozen. sounds like a fairly scientic show? u r wrong. they turned it into some semi-horror flick halfway thru, n managed to sink the whole show. fuck. n den, when i went to the toilet in mandarin hotel to clean my wound, the toilet lights started flickering. yes, i was alone in the toilet. yes, it did not flicker when a bunch of gals were in the toilet too. yes, i've never felt secure in that toilet despite all the times i've been there. yes, the lights above mi flickered twice. creeped mi out drastically n i turned tail n left. the cab took forever to come, n now i'm feeling very battered, tired n creeped out. =( woe is mi.. i need someone to sympathise with mi, n tell mi that i dun ever have to fear or worry that the same things will happen again. my toe hurts.. i need some cuddling n cooing to.. *sobs*
recently, i've started wondering more and more whether he has someone else.
i used to write alot of emo rubbish. now, i've turned to emo sketches. did a sketch todae, but can't show it coz itz already sealed into an envelope.
it never fails to surprise and horrify mi, how love can change so suddenly. it seems so fickle. two people who are in love one dae, might be out of love the next. but usually, itz one side dat turns, while the other is left to suffer the pain of love lost. most of the times though, both sides end up with some degree of hurt, no matter who turned away. i'm not talkin about my own life. i hope i'm not anyway. in a moment of greyness.. mayb i'm pms-ing without knowing. i hope i am. reality would be sad otherwise. i'm feelin some endless loneliness, like most of the light in the world have decided to forsake mi. once in awhile, i get this helpless, hopeless, sinkin sensation, n i dun mind drowning. nothing can lift mi up now but you. but you are the same person who let mi sink. |
it's hard to describe the many facets of my personality, i'm a few people cast in a single mould. i'm a walkin contradiction, a major complication. i confuse ppl. i live in my own fairytale world, where damsels in pastel dresses save knights in distress.. to summarise: i am anger barely leashed violence barely reined wildness prowls on my edges fire barely banked this is the darker side of me no fluffy pink clouds no bright blue sky i am not your average sweetie pie to me there's more than meets the eye. amanda andy cheryl christopher christopher dei principe edward faith fion gary gracie gwen jiayi jillian joel kaiyan kayee kei luke melvin mervin min rykiel shu sining suying terence wenrong weini yongen yuling S.I.M UBSIM Golden Village Friendster S.O.T Magazine Twoartszeroone Little Miss Drinkalot Xiaxue Tiny White Bra Dawn Yang Fcukling Black High Heels Of Euphoria The Travelling Hungryboy Jolin Tsai Rainie Yang Pace Wu Show AliveNotDead Uehara Takako Jonathan Bennett Biotherm sOmang laneige clarins So Close Initial D Howl's Moving Castle Japanese Website Howl's Moving Castle Official Website Les Fils Du Vent-YAMAKASI Emily The Strange Little Apple Dolls Ola Lola Kikix Hoard Gobi The Perfect Fairy Cakes Pizza DeviantArt Blogskins July 2004 l August 2004 l September 2004 l October 2004 l November 2004 l December 2004 l January 2005 l February 2005 l March 2005 l April 2005 l May 2005 l June 2005 l July 2005 l August 2005 l September 2005 l October 2005 l November 2005 l December 2005 l January 2006 l February 2006 l March 2006 l April 2006 l May 2006 l June 2006 l July 2006 l August 2006 l September 2006 l October 2006 l November 2006 l December 2006 l January 2007 l February 2007 l March 2007 l April 2007 l May 2007 l June 2007 l July 2007 l August 2007 l September 2007 l October 2007 l November 2007 l December 2007 l January 2008 l February 2008 l March 2008 l April 2008 l May 2008 l June 2008 l July 2008 l August 2008 l September 2008 l designed by: dreamwalker powered by: blogger game scripted by: Lancer |